81. The Stories Bosses Must Tell to Motivate and Inspire Employees

Transcript -Episode 81: The Stories Bosses Must Tell to Motivate and Inspire Employees

Joe:
There are many skills a leader must hone and practice to be a successful boss. One of them, storytelling doesn’t get mentioned often but is critically important. I’ve got a special Boss’s Day surprise for you right now on Boss Better Now!

Jamie:
You’re listening to Boss Better Now. This show is sponsored by Joe Mull and Associates. Now here’s your host, speaker, and author, Joe Mull.

Joe:
A warm and heartfelt Happy Boss’s Day to each and every one of you. You are BossHeroes who go to work every day creating the conditions at work for people to thrive. It’s your day, and I hope that you feel like there are some people around you making a bit of a fuss about you for Boss’s Day. It’s not really a holiday, is it? It’s sort of an observation. But if you, if they don’t, if you don’t have anybody making a fuss about you right now, please remember that’s probably more about them being busy and distracted than it is about you falling short in some way. If you didn’t get any recognition from your team, that’s okay, but allow me to bestow it upon you. Now, there are hundreds of ways that you have shown up in service to others over the past year. You’ve advocated on their behalf. You’ve been there to advise and counsel people. You’ve many times swallowed your frustration and you have no doubt put in countless hours of work behind the scenes to help others that they have never seen.

Joe:
And so, we say to you today — for all of it, thank you. Your reward is the privilege that comes with being called a leader and gratitude for all of this work. And in celebration of your special day, BossHeroes, I have a gift for you on this week’s episode of the podcast. A number of months ago, I was invited to do a mini-keynote for a virtual conference of healthcare and long-term care professionals. The program I did was just 25 minutes long, but it was a lot of fun. It mixed stories and humor and some practical advice for helping with motivation and morale in challenging times. It was called The Stories Bosses Must Tell to Motivate and Inspire Employees. And I’ve decided to share the whole thing with you here today. Now, because this program was virtual, you’re not going to hear an audience. There’s no laughter or applause. It was just me, in my studio, delivering this to a bunch of people attending online. So, you’ll hear me talking to them and you’ll hear me acknowledging some of their chat box comments along the way. But, it’s a program that I thought you would enjoy, and a message that we all need to hear from time to time. I had a lot of fun putting this one together and I hope you enjoy it. Happy Boss’s Day, friends. Here it is.

Joe:
For me, my plan B has always been a job as ticket taker at the movie theater. You know how there are days when you think to yourself, I have had just about enough of this job, and you start thinking about a plan B? You are so done with feeling tired or stressed or unappreciated that you ask yourself, What’s the easiest, most mindless gig I could go and get?

Joe:
Whatever you think of, that’s your plan B. And for as long as I can remember, I’ve always said that my fallback job, my plan B – the job I’d go and get when I’ve got nothing left to give is ticket taker at the movie theater. I mean, come on, that’s a pretty sweet gig, right? First, I’d be in the air conditioning all summer long. Second, I figure you probably get to see movies and eat popcorn a lot, and that’s pretty great. And third, talk about job security. Nothing’s going to kill that industry. I mean, what could possibly happen that would, you know, <laugh> close down all the movie theaters. But the main reason that job appeals to me is because as I see it, it requires no thought at all.

Joe:
On your left (pretending to rip tickets and direct), on your left… on your left… So that’s my plan. B. What’s yours? What is the job that you’d be tempted to go and get if you just wanted to punch a clock and not think? Put your answer in the chat box. What is the job that you would go and get if the most important thing to you was to coast, or be on autopilot, or just not have to bring your full self to it? Kathy says, “I would be a brownie baker.” Yeah, that sounds like a pretty good gig, right? If you get to sample the brownies, you get to taste them. Jessica says she’d want to be a florist. Uh, Steve says he wants to be a fry cook. Susan wants to be a dog walker. We’ve got another florist. We’ve got a flower arranger… uh, starter at a golf course. Matt, that’s the right answer, my friend.

Joe:
Uh, Tiff says, “I want to work at a geology museum.” Maggie wants to be a baby… Uh, baker! Kara says she’s going to be a babysitter, but for good kids only. Absolutely! Good for us all to have a plan B. But now, here’s my second question… and this is a question that’s going to also require you to type an answer in the chat box. Here goes, you haven’t pulled the trigger yet on your plan B. So, there must be something about your job right now that gets you out of bed every day. What is it? What keeps you walking through the door at your workplace? Why do you stay and endure so many challenges? Kara says, “My team,” and Tiff said, “My awesome team” Brad says impact. Jessica says, the amazing people, the flexible schedule. Cathy says, meeting amazing people and hearing their stories. There has to be something that gets us out of bed in the morning, right?

Joe:
Steve says “It’s the opportunity to make a difference.” The answers that are listed here and the answers that anyone gives to that question about what gets you out of bed in the morning and why you haven’t bailed out for your plan B. The answer to that question is a suitcase packed full of the stories you could tell me about all of the different ways your work makes a difference in the lives of others. And it turns out that those stories are the key to recharging and energizing your teams when times are tough. Most bosses want to become the kind of leader who can motivate employees. The problem is that while a select few seem to be born with that gift, for most of us, inspiring others isn’t something we automatically know how to do. It has to be learned, yet nobody is teaching us. But we can start fixing that right here today.

Joe:
The truth is that stories are the most powerful form of communication in human existence. We listen to stories, we connect with stories, and we remember those stories that access our emotions, overcome our doubts, and bring clarity to our thinking. The shortest path to becoming the kind of boss who motivates and inspires others is to devote yourself to becoming a better storyteller. And specifically, we have to learn as leaders to identify and share the big story about what your employees are there to do, and then tell all the little stories that prove the big story over and over again. And that is what I’m here to talk with you about today. Let’s start with your big story. There is a big story you can tell about the work your team does. The big story is the difference your work makes in the lives of others and the language that you choose to use to tell that story in as succinct and powerful way as possible matters.

Joe:
A couple of years ago, I got a call from the administrator of a women’s health oncology clinic, and I had known her for a number of years — talented devoted leader. And she said, “Joe, we’re really struggling. I’m wondering if you would sit down with our lead physician and I and help us talk through some of our challenges.” And I sat down with them, and I said, “What’s going on?” And she said, “Well, you know how you wrote about all that team drama stuff? Yeah, that’s happening here.” I said, “Tell me more about that, what’s happening?” And she said, “Well, it’s like we have a class system. Our front desk people feel talked down to by the medical assistants. The medical assistants feel talked down to by the surgery schedulers, the surgery schedulers feel talked down to by the PAs. And the PAs don’t think anybody likes them.”

Joe:
And the doctors, they don’t really have a sense of what’s going on. And the result is everybody’s working in silos. She said “I have people who hunt and peck through the inbox and do the things that they want to do, instead of just making sure everything gets done in the order that it comes in.” She said “I have some people on my team who think that when their work is done, their work is done.” As we sat and talked that day, we all arrived in agreement at the idea that there was no sense of interdependence on the team. No sense that if I give it all I’ve got and pitch in and help you, that makes your life easier. And when you do that, it makes my life easier. How do you fix that? Where do you even start? So that day we ended up creating a mini intervention that was 50% practicality, 50% theater.

Joe:
Here’s what they did. The lead physician asked the members of his team to stay late one evening for five minutes for a quick meeting in their lunchroom. Everybody jammed into the space. It was a little bit too small to fit everybody in there. A bunch of people were seated around the table, everybody else was jammed along the back wall, shoulder to shoulder. And after a little bit of housekeeping at the beginning, he said,” I, I asked you to stay this evening cuz I want to ask you a question and it might seem a strange question to ask, but just go with me on this. What’s your job?”

Joe:
And everybody stared back at him, and he said, “No, I’m serious. I want to know how you answered that question. What’s your job?” And he turned to the first person sitting on his left and he said, “What’s your job?” And she had been there for three weeks, and she did this. “Uh, I’m a… a patient information coordinator. So, I, I check in the patient, and I get the intake paperwork filled out and I collect the copay and I get everybody seated and I make sure everybody gets called back. Is that right?” The doctor went to the next person. He said, “Dana, what’s your job?” Dana said, “I’m a PA, I’m a physician’s assistant. I see patients and implement a plan of care in collaboration with the physicians in the practice.” And around the table he went, “What’s your job? What’s your job? What’s your job?” And the answers he got back were titles and duties.

Joe:
And when the last person over here had finished speaking, he took a breath, and he slumped his shoulders. I told you there was a little bit of theater involved in this. And he said, “I am sorry I owe you an apology. I’ve been remiss in my obligation as the leader of this practice to help you understand what your job really is. But that stops today. That ends right now. Because anytime anybody asks you what you do or anytime anybody asks you what’s your job? I don’t want you to say any of the stuff you just said. You just said instead I want you to say this.” And he turned around and on the dry-erase board behind him, he wrote a three-word phrase. And when he stepped aside, everybody in the room read the sentence, I cure cancer.

Joe:
He said, “That’s your job. That’s what we do here.” And he turned to the first young lady on his left. He said “You do it by checking in patients and getting the intake paperwork filled out and collecting copays, and taking care of the waiting room. And Dana, you do it by seeing patients and implementing a plan of care and collaboration with the physicians in the practice. But you can’t do that without her, and she can’t do her work without you.” And around the table he went, creating line of sight between even the most mundane tasks and duties of someone’s job and this powerful purpose that stirs the soul. That’s the big story he told that day about their work eye cure cancer. Now if you had been a fly on the wall that day, you would’ve seen a really cool thing happen in that room. Chests slowly begin to rise, shoulders fell. Two ladies in the back of the room had tears in their eyes. Later, one person at the meeting said, “When he said eye cure cancer, the hair on my neck stood up and I got goosebumps. I’d never thought about it that way before.” And when the physician leader had finished speaking, he said, “Does anybody have any questions?” And of course, nobody did. And he said, “Thank you all for coming.” Now nobody here is naive enough to think that boom, that fixed everything. Of course not. But it was a starting point for a conversation that they needed to work on and continue over time about why we do what we do and how we all contribute to it. I cure cancer is the big story. What’s your big story? If I asked you to give it to me in one sentence, what would you write in the chat box right now?

Joe:
What is the difference your work makes in the lives of others? Go ahead and type that in the chat box right now. Another word I use to talk about this big story is cause I wrote about this in my second book, the No More Team Drama book, your big story or your cause are all of the different ways your work makes a difference in the lives of others. David said his big story is empower. Kara says “I help people sleep better at night by making their bosses better.” Maggie says people enjoy their jobs more. Now I will tell you when do deeper dive long-form leadership development workshops for leaders across the country? And I pose this question to them, and I say, I really want you to think about the stories you could tell me about the work that that, that you do and the difference it makes in the lives of others. I will tell you that the answers I get back first typically don’t go far enough. When I ask people, What’s your cause? What’s the difference your work makes in the lives of others? Give it to me in one sentence. Most of the time I get something back that resembles the company’s marketing slogan or or their tagline on their website or their mission statement. And there’s a place for all of that language. But in terms of becoming a better storyteller as a leader, they don’t go far enough.

Joe:
And let me give you an example of what I mean. A couple of years ago I was doing one of these workshops with a room full of people outside of Cleveland, Ohio, and I was going around the room going, What’s your cause? What’s your cause? What’s your big story? What’s your cause? And I had three ladies at a table over here and I could tell they couldn’t wait to answer. They were doing this. (Gestures excitedly) And finally, I got to them, What’s your cause? What’s your cause? What’s your cause? And the woman sitting in the middle said “We make babies.” I said “That’s your cause we make babies?” She said, “Yeah, they work in a fertility clinic.” I said “We make babies. That’s the cause?” And she said, “Yeah.” I said “That’s not good enough.” She said, “Why?” I said “Cause so do I.” And she said, “Well, yeah Joe, but if you and your wife have difficulty, then you come see us.” I said, “Ah, tell me more about that.” And whew, as you can imagine with an incredible amount of compassion and caring, she described all of the stress and and suffering, and difficulty that their patients have to go through before ever becoming their patients. She said they actually sign up in a way for more stress and difficulty just by becoming our patients.

Joe:
And she said, “My favorite part of my job though is watching a couple who have started to come to terms with the fact that this thing they’ve been dreaming about their entire life isn’t going to happen for them. And then it does — getting to share that news with them and be a part of that journey with them. That’s what gets me outta bed in the morning, Joe.” And I said,”Ah, there it is!” I said, “Don’t you see? You don’t make babies. You make dreams come true.” You will know your big story when you say it to someone else and it stops them in their tracks. You will know you’ve landed on the right language for your cause when it makes the hair on your neck stand up or it gives you, as Kara said “Goosebumps.” So, this is a challenge I have for you to come up with that cause – that big story for your team, your version of “I cure cancer”, or “We make dreams come true.”

Joe:
Your cause should highlight the ways your team relieves suffering or inparts joy because they tried hard and got it right. Every job makes a difference in the lives of others. The food service worker and senior care communities, the call center operator or retail employee at a shopping mall at Christmas time. And yes, even the ticket taker at the movie theater. In fact, let’s use that role. Let’s use ticket taker to explore the other kinds of stories that leaders have to tell. You see, telling that big story over and over again isn’t enough to motivate people. Leaders have to also tell all the little stories they see and think of all year long that prove the big story over and over again. And if I were running a movie theater and I hired you to be my ticket taker, there are a number of different kinds of little stories that I could highlight that illustrate why your work matters so very much.

Joe:
For example, shortly after you started working for me, I call you into my office and ask this question, hey, who do you know that has been married for a really long time? Now, you might cite your parents or grandparents or maybe some family friends or neighbors. Whenever you tell me who you are thinking of, I’m going to give you homework. Hey, can I ask you to do me a favor? Would you call them up and ask them to tell you about their first date and then come back and tell me as much as you can about it? Now, when you go and ask this long-married couple about their first date, you’re probably going to get a really sweet story filled with detailed memories of where they went and what they wore, and all the feelings. And when you come back to me and pass along what you heard, I’m going to ask you a follow-up question.

Joe:
Isn’t it remarkable that they can remember so many details about a night that happened so long ago? I mean, most of us can’t remember what we had for lunch yesterday and most days that pass are destined to be forgotten. But in our lives, there are a few that stand out. There are a few that get burned in. And guess what? Every single person walking past you while you take tickets might be in the middle of a night, they’re going to remember for the rest of their lives. And we get to be a part of that. Isn’t that something?

Joe:
Now, shortly after this conversation, I’m going to give you another assignment. Hey, come here. Can you do me a favor? Would you go find someone in your life with children under the age of 10? I want you to ask them two questions. First, when was the last time they went to a movie without the kids in too? And second, what kind of arrangements did they have to make to get away for a few hours? Would you come back and tell me what they said? Now if you have kids, you already know what’s coming back, right? My kids are 10, eight, and four a kid. Free night at the movies is like winning the lottery. We have a sitter. This is happening. Yes, Our joy at getting away for just a little bit is so overpowering that we don’t care at all about spending $39 for two small sodas and a couple of crusty milk duds. I mean, with three kids, I’m out 50 bucks for a sitter before even leaving the driveway. But I don’t care. A real-life grown-up movie with swearing and guns and no talking animals — take my money.

Joe:
And when you, my dear ticket taker, come back and tell me the story of everything that couple has to do just to go to the movies, I’m going to say, you know what? I think it’s worth remembering that every person walking past you might be someone who had to arrange quite a lot just to get into our building tonight. My job as your boss is to get you to see that your job is much more sophisticated than standing still and tearing tickets. My job is to use all the little stories like these to help you believe the big story about our movie theater, which is this. What we do here is help our customers escape stress, make memories, and have fun. That’s our cause at my movie theater. And I’m going to repeatedly try to stir your soul with all these little stories that prove this thesis over and over again.

Joe:
I’m going to point out to you when I see a father taking their child to their first Star Wars movie. And then I’m going to ask you about the first movie you remember seeing as a kid. I’m going to direct your attention to the obvious excitement of all those folks who line up early in costume for the latest summer blockbuster. And then I’ll ask you about the movies you were most excited to see over the course of your life. I’ll point out how affected and emotional our guests are after walking out of the latest Oscar-nominated tearjerker. And then I’ll ask you about the most recent movie you saw that made you really feel something. And along the way, I’m going to answer any question you ask me about why a rule is in place or why a change is occurring. Not by citing policy or regulations or organizational directives, but by telling you the story of how the policy, regulation, directive, or change impacts real people.

Joe:
I will find a way to connect my answer to your question, to our larger cause of helping our customers escape stress, make memories, and have fun. And I have to do this. I have to use these little stories to tell the big story of our purpose. Because as it is, the only way I’m going to get you to try hard when you’re tired or get you to come to work when you’d rather not, or at a minimum, just get you to try and bring a higher quality energy to the interactions you have with those around you. So, there you have it. If you want to be the kind of boss who motivates others, you must devote yourself to becoming a better storyteller. You must tell the big story of the difference your work makes in the lives of others. And then tell all the little stories that prove the big story over and over again.

Joe:
And right now, when so many on your team are exhausted, when so many have been going at 10,000 RPMs for so long and with no end in sight, this this is what they need to hear from you. This is what they need from their boss just to get through the day. And oh my, the stories you can tell as I was giving the examples of the little stories, I bet you thought of some little stories you should probably tell more often where you work. What are they? Tell me about that in the chat box now. What is one of the little stories you need to make sure you give voice to that you pull people aside and remind them about what are some of the little stories that you can shine a light on because they prove your big story –your cause over and over again.

Joe:
What has popped into your mind while we’ve been talking about the ticket taker at the movie theater, I’d love to see what you have to say in the chat box. What are your little stories that need to be told over and over again? Kara says, “Success stories of bosses who have seen the light and become a better leader for their people.” Sure, absolutely. And imagine all of the ways that we’ve relieved suffering there, right? If that boss starts showing up in a different way, uh, we’ve, we’ve imparted joy and relieved suffering. Imagine what it’s like for those employees to go home now, uh, and not feel maybe some of the difficult, uh, stressors and challenges that they were feeling from working with that person previously.

Joe:
Maggie says, “Resident getting better care because the CNA stayed longer than 30 days.” Absolutely. Kara says “This year, we’re helping staff and leaders find resilience within themselves to cope through this difficult time.” You know, and one of the little stories we could tell then is maybe you just after you get off a phone call with one of those leaders who says, “Thank you. I’m really glad we had this conversation. I so much better now.” You know, in that moment, you know that for at least a period of time, you took someone from here down to here. Susan says “I need to tell my story of how hard my team is working to respond to help find nursing staff, especially during this time.” Jessica says “Compassionate nurses who truly have a heart for the folks in their senior care communities.”

Joe:
Let me give you one last tip for what really makes a powerful little story in service to the big story. And that is to make it singular, not plural. When we tell stories in a way, we’re conditioned to tell them about a group of people. We talk about our residents, we talk about our guests, we talk about our patients, we talk about our customers, and that’s important, we should do that. But little story… zero in on one person. If somebody asks me, hey, why did we change the hours in our clinic? I have to come in a half an hour early now that stinks. If I’m the boss, I’m going to respond to that, not by saying, well, some of our patients need to be in earlier. It’s just the way that it is. I might instead say something like this. Yeah, I know you’re going to have to come in a half an hour earlier. And I know that’s no fun, but have you ever noticed when Mrs. Jones comes for her monthly medication appointment, the bus she takes to get here, it leaves her sitting outside on the bench 20 minutes before we open. And there have been days where she’s been out there with an umbrella in the rain and she’s not the only one. So, I know that it stinks that you’re coming into work half an hour early. But the reason we made this change is so that Mrs. Jones doesn’t have to sit outside in the rain. It’s more powerful, isn’t it? Focus on singular, not plural. When people see that their work makes a difference in the lives of others and specific others, we become more motivated, more inspired, more energized. Tell those stories. Tell them to your team and on the hardest days, seek them out for yourself. They are food for your soul. And I promise they’ll keep you away from your plan B for just a little while longer.

Jamie:
This show is sponsored by Joe Mull and Associates. Remember, commitment comes from better bosses. Visit joemull.com today.