25. Staying Inspired as a Boss + Workload Scorekeepers

Episode 25: Staying Inspired as a Boss + Workload Scorekeepers (Summary)

As a boss, are you finding inspiration in all the right places? Plus, how to respond when employees ask “what does so and so do all day, anyway?” It’s ahead now, on Boss Better Now.

Links:
To learn more about Joe Mull, visit his website ​Joemull.com​.
To hear more from Joe Mull visit his YouTube channel​.
To learn how to invite Joe to speak at an event, visit ​Joemull.com/speaking​.
To check date availability or to get a quote for an event, email ​hello@joemull.com​.
To explore options for coaching from Alyssa Mullet, visit ​Joemull.com/coaching​.
For more information on the BossBetter Leadership Academy, visit Joemull.com/academy.
Email the show at bossbetternow@gmail.com.
To leave comments, ask questions, or to message us visit our Boss Better Now Podcast Facebook Page.
Connect with Joe on Instagram.
Connect with Joe on Twitter.
Connect with Joe on LinkedIn.

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Transcript – Episode 25: Staying Inspired as a Boss + Workload Scorekeepers

Joe:
As a boss, are you finding inspiration in all the right places? Plus, how to respond when employees ask, what does so-and-so do all day anyway? It’s ahead now on Boss Better Now.

Alyssa:
You’re listening to Boss Better Now. Please welcome speaker, author, and chronic over-planner, Joe Mull.

Joe:
That’s so true. Welcome again, BossHeroes to the weekly show that offers advice, humor, and encouragement to bosses everywhere. Whether you are listening during exercise, in the office, during your commute, or while planning a much-needed summer vacation, we are glad you’re here. Joining me once again is executive coach, Alyssa Mullet. I am a chronic over-planner. Are you?

Alyssa:
Oh, amidst my color-coded plethora of things that our audience, luckily, can’t see, because it’s behind the camera… Uh, it seems almost ridiculous to confirm. Yes, yes, yes. With every fiber of my being, I am an over-planner. It’s actually probably one of my least favorite qualities – to the point of a weakness – because I feel like I can suck the joy right out of any event… upcoming thing. And I’m sorry, mom, but I get it very honestly and she knows it. Um, so this is a learned skill and, uh, I’m trying to unlearn it, but does it become a problem for you? Have you noticed that ever about yourself? Sometimes?

Joe:
I mean, I will make plans, to make plans and that’s a little absurd. Right. You know, like I’ve put, I plan for time in my planner to do planning. Like whether it’s on my calendar or whatnot. Uh, my favorite phrase in the whole wide world is, “what’s the plan?” And like, to the point where my kids say it. Like when we wake up in the morning, they’ll be like, “what’s the plan?” I’m like, “I am so glad you asked.” Let’s review in bullet point format. Um, and, and, and that’s a problem when other people don’t want there to be a plan. I’ve, I’ve gotten better at that a little bit… Like on vacation. Uh, you know, there, there are days when you’re on vacation where you don’t want to have a plan. But for me, like as long as I know that that’s the plan. I’m good. Right? The plan for today is there is no plan and that’s actually a plan. So, I’m good. High-five.

Alyssa:
Yeah. Okay. I feel you. I feel you. I just… The out-of-control-ness of there not existing, any kind of plan is where you kind of draw the line… Is it’s okay to not have a plan, but that needs to be designated as the plan.

Joe:
Be agreed upon and expressed in advance. Thus, making it a plan. And I know that, you know, we’ve talked on here about, about Myers-Briggs before. And I know that that some of that is from my innate personality preferences. I move through the world and see the world as a series of decisions to be made. And I draw a great deal of comfort from organizing the world around me. Uh, and that’s why planning is such a big thing. Like my wife even knows – it’s kind of a joke – but it’s kind of not like when I’m in an agitated state of mind, whether I’m sad, or depressed, or frustrated, she’ll be like, “Do you want to make a list?”

Joe:
Like, “Cause I know that that makes you feel better.” And I’m like, “Oh, you always know what to say, Honey.”

Alyssa:
It’s like the beautiful chocolate bar being offered up…”Do you want to make a list?” That’s great. I love it.

Joe:
That’s what you get …You get like eighteen years with somebody, they know exactly when they’re like… Okay, you know, some people are like doing a glass of wine. And my wife’s like, “Do you want to like write things down – pros and cons? Cause that’s sort of your thing.”

Alyssa:
Let’s get into it.

Joe:
Let’s do it!

Alyssa:
This brings up the first segment, which I brought to our conversations of, you know, what can we bring to the podcast? Which goes to, to ask our bosses out there… What is it that we allow… we allow, to inspire us? Right? So, we have this as over-planners, right? We have this very strategic way of looking at things and this defined terms under which things make logical sense. But when we say inspire, that’s a… maybe puts in a different context, right? What does that say to you? Inspire?

Joe:
Inspire to me, I equate with energize, right? What, what lifts you up? Or maybe it’s maybe it’s energy, but maybe it’s also mood. Right? What moves you into a better, more positive mood, or what, what lifts raises your energy levels? That’s that’s the connotation that I get from inspire. What about you?

Alyssa:
Okay. So, inspire to me is like this energy of creation of creativity, of sure… Of, of being able to, um, have that forward momentum, that motivation that you talk about. But it’s also like as deeper ability to shift whether it’s mindset or physically moving forward on a project. Inspiration is something that I think, we as a whole of society, have defined in these very specific terms. And we don’t think about it a whole lot in the context of leadership, meaning what do we allow to frame in as inspiration in that space? We have what inspires us whenever we’re at home. And you know, I, uh, looking at art, maybe listening to music, right? These are things that we think of as self-care or nourishing to our spirit versus this mentality of what’s allowable for professional development. I, I can listen to this podcast. Yes, yes. You should listen to this podcast. I can take this seminar. Yes. Maybe you should take that seminar, but where can we allow those lines to blur? And what is possible for us as leaders when we can draw upon those things that maybe inspire our soul on a deeper level or our brain in a creative manner and allow that into the professional development space.

Joe:
That’s interesting. So, is there an argument then? And I think, I mean, I’m, I’m, it’s a rhetorical question. I guess I’m just re-framing what I think I heard you say. An argument could be made then that taking an hour to go to the museum on your lunch break and walking around because it nurtures your soul does translate into being more effective in a leadership role. Do I have it, does that? What you’re saying?

Alyssa:
You got it. You got it. You know, I reflected upon this thought pattern of… For years when I was in the corporate space, I would take my lunch… However long I took for lunch, whether we call it 30 minutes, 40 minutes, whatever I took, right. I would eat quickly at my desk. And then my favorite thing to do was to go outside and walk around the local university campus, get into the little bit of a park that was available to me, where there was greenery, some kind of nature, where I didn’t see a screen. Right. And being able to connect my feet to pavement, my body to movement, and my eyes to nature, always brought me back with a renewed sense of what was possible for me to yet to accomplish that day. What I could do to make myself feel better, mentally, right?… About the work that I had yet remaining or about the team meetings that I had, how I could help this person or what I might be able to… perspective I might be able to share. Now looking back and reflecting upon that. I can say that that’s exactly what I was doing. But I did not correlate that. And I, I often thought that it was selfish of me to be, you know, outside of the office, gallivanting, if you will. Taking my walk. And, and now I can really understand that that was probably one of the most important parts of me showing up for myself and inspiring myself to continue on each and every day.

Joe:
You’re making a case, I think in a lot of ways for, for why it’s so important for leaders at all levels to really notice when they’re at their best and when they’re not. And to notice the things that influence them in one direction or another. And that noticing can be in the form of just thinking about the time of day or that noticing can be in the form of what types of work or interactions or experiences lead to, you know, my mood and energy going in one direction or another. Because once we get … gather, some of that data to use my very logic-oriented brain, once we collect that insight, we can plan and respond accordingly i.e. If I know that from three to five, one day, I need to, to be involved in a really difficult meeting or conversation. And I’ve learned that three to five in the afternoon is, is not a good window for me in terms of my sharpness, my focus, my energy.

Joe:
But if I’ve been taking an inventory of these things and I’ve been noticing these things, I go, yeah, but you know what, on days when I exercise in the morning and I go in an hour late and stay an hour late just to offset that my three to five is actually my two to four and I’m a little sharper. So, I’m going to do that on this particular day. Now I haven’t talked about the art piece of this, but at least in terms of the noticing that you’re talking about, if we open ourselves up to the idea that just because it doesn’t fit into the perfect categorization of professional development doesn’t mean that it doesn’t help us be more effective in our roles. Right. I have a colleague who, um, will go to yoga three days a week. Well, before the pandemic… Would go to yoga three days a week during her lunch break for exactly this reason.

Alyssa:
Yeah, this is what I think is, is what spoke to me about this topic was that we enable work to blur into our personal lives a whole lot easier than we allow our personal lives to blur into work. Meaning…looking to that personal, what inspires you personally? How, what do you, when I go out in nature, when, I… you know, see art, when I listen to music and allowing that noticing, right, and allowing it to inspire you as a professional, it doesn’t have to be this defined box of only “this” for professional development. What’s possible when we allow ourselves the opportunity to inspire, to look to our personal lives, to inspire us?

Joe:
I have always shied away from the title of “motivational speaker”. To me, it feels like fluff, but I’ve had a lot of people come up to me after keynotes or workshops and say that was so motivational. And I’m so inspired. And, you know, I’d like to think that, you know, maybe it’s in part because of the energy and the fun that we have, but I’ve always argued that if people come away from a workshop feeling inspired, it’s probably because they have answers. It’s probably because they had some kind of experience that sparked a new way of looking at things or they got some new information they have now ideas that they can go and implement that they didn’t have before they came into the room. And so, who cares where that comes from, who cares, whether that was sparked by a good speaker or because you were reading a book or because you went to the museum and looked at art. Who cares? The fact is if we can just notice where we get that from, we might be able to engineer it more often in our professional lives.

Alyssa:
Yes. Yeah. Screw the judgment – self-inflicted or otherwise – allow the inspiration into your life, leaders.

Joe:
You know, I got a question on Facebook a couple of weeks ago in a group that I’m in, um, for, uh, other trainers, coaches, and consultants. And I thought it was a really interesting question. This was the question. “In what ways does your expertise prevent innovation?” “Where does your expertise get in the way of innovation?” And I just like that question stopped me for a minute. I kind of looked at it and thought, Ooh, that’s like an SAT question. That’s an essay question. That’s not just a, oh, I know the answer. That’s a, I need to think about this and formulate the components of it. And what I arrived at was… My expertise stands in the way of innovation because I’m often so busy doing the expert thing that I don’t carve out the time to be creative and to find new ideas. Like one of the things, I know about myself is my creativity in is sparked by reading, reading books, by reading, how other people talk about some of the same sorts of things that I work on.

Joe:
You get new language and new perspectives. But I just, I don’t make the time for it that I should. I know that I can’t even read a book without a notepad next to me because I’ll read two paragraphs and then I’ll have to like jot down something that it sparked in me that I could maybe use later for our audience here on the podcast or in workshops and whatnot. It’s almost robbed the joy of reading from me because it sparks so much thought that I, feel like I could use later that not capturing it, seems, seems like a waste. But what I recognized is when I don’t protect time in my schedule to do those things, there is no creativity. There is no innovation. When I allow being an expert or doing my job to be the only thing that I do. And so, if I don’t protect that time, I am no longer creative or innovative. And what’s my lifespan at that point as a professional,

Alyssa:
What a great insight into this. I, that is a, uh, a beautiful framework, you know, that we can utilize. And it, you know, for those of you who are thinking, well, I don’t have to be creative in my job — wrong. Wrong. People are unique and individual creatures. We are creatures of creativity. And as a leader who manages those people, you have to be creative for creating environments in which they will thrive. In helping people maximize their productivity, their performance. That creates… That craves creativity. So, you are a part of creating that creativity in your workplace as a leader.

Joe:
And let’s also be clear on what we mean by creativity. Cause sometimes I think people hear that word and they think of an artist, or they think of somebody inventing something or coming up with a new idea. We sort of translate being creative with the arts or being artistic in some way. And when it comes to working as a boss, creativity is… isn’t necessarily having a new idea, but it could just be finding the right words for a tough conversation. You know, if, if you know that you, you have to figure out a way to communicate something to your team, and you’re not sure how to make the case for it, but then you give your brain the break that it needs to re-energize and disconnect for a little while. When you come back to that, suddenly the words are there, and that’s creativity that, that is sparked by the, to use the term you used earlier, the self-care that you’ve given to yourself so that, you know, all, all of the gears can operate at their highest levels.

Alyssa:
Inspiration can come in many forms. And I think that where it comes to me most is in the form of a new perspective. I, whenever I do something that inspires, me when I allow myself the opportunity and I create that space in which I can be inspired — it inevitably inspires a shift in a perspective, and that can be applied to so many different aspects of my life, personal, professional, all the boxes. So, look for ways in which you can be inspired and allow yourself to be inspired.

Joe:
Well said.

Joe:
Before we give you the Camaraderie Question of the Week, know that we’d love to hear your answers on where you draw creativity from… Where you draw inspiration from… What do you do that takes care of yourself and makes you better at work? Share your answers with us on the Boss Better Now podcast page or email us bossbetternow@gmail.com.

Joe:
But we have arrived Alyssa to the Camaraderie Question of the Week. Bosses build camaraderie on teams by making it easier for people to find things in common with each other. So, every week we give you a question you can use to facilitate connection and build camaraderie. This is a generic question. And it’s just a fun one, I think. Alyssa, what is something that made you laugh out loud recently?

Alyssa:
Oh, I should have cleared this before we went on “air”.

Joe:
Live.

Alyssa:
But I guess we’re just going to put it out there….and then if you need to “bleep” something…

Joe:
I mean, if it’s terrible, I can edit it out later. Right. We don’t usually do that with our recording, so. All right…. we’ve teased it!

Alyssa:
You’re gonna get it raw folks, probably…Okay. So you’re gonna laugh and I’m going to try to get through it without laughing. But… So… This past weekend we went as a treat to my son, my seven-year-old to one of his favorite restaurants. And we have not been out to restaurants. Let me just tell you for a long time, like year plus. Okay. So, we went to his favorite restaurant and it’s a, it’s a local chain, I think, uh, to Pittsburgh, but they play like all kinds of like kind of eclectic music. So, we’re sitting there out on the back patio, enjoying our chips and salsa and the song comes on and it’s kind of a reggae-ish, you know, but it’s got some kind of weird beats in the back and the, the chorus, the refrain keeps coming back and I’m like, what is that? The words? And the words to me were, I looked at my husband and I said, is it saying, “living in a plastic butthole?”

Alyssa:
And he’s like, “What?” I go, “the song, the song overhead, listen to what it’s saying.” He instantaneously starts cracking up. He’s like that can’t be the words to the song… But you can’t unhear it once I’ve said it. You can’t unhear it. So, he actually had to look up the words to the song and it’s “living in a plastic bubble.” Okay. But (singing) “living in a plastic bubble, living in a plastic bubble”… It did not sound like bubble folks. It sounded like “butthole”. And now this whole week, anytime any of us does anything that’s like remotely, you know, crazy and, or just a little silly…. They’re like, “What are you living in a plastic butthole?” We burst out, laughing out loud. All of us.

Joe:
That reminds me of there’s a CCR Creedence Clearwater Revival song where the lyric is, uh, “there’s a bad moon on the rise” and somebody once heard it as “there’s a bathroom on the right.” And that’s all I hear now, whenever I hear that song, (singing) “there’s a bathroom on the right?” Yeah. Same kind of thing. That’s a great example. You didn’t need to clear that ahead of time. That’s fine.

Alyssa:
Okay…. Oh….All right. So, what has made you laugh out loud of late?

Joe:
When I came to this question, I thought I should just answer the first thing that popped in my head. And then of course, what popped into my head was the dumbest thing ever, but I’m like, all right, I’m just going to share it. And you know, it is what it is. So, I was traveling last week for the first time… In 15 months, I did a live on-site training for a client in Kansas. And, um, I will FaceTime with the kids. Um, you’re not an Apple product user, Alyssa face FaceTime is this glorious video chat you can do with your kids. Um, and on the Apple devices, they have this little feature where you can replace your head with a piece… a clip, art cartoon character. And they have all these different ones to choose from. And my four-year-old son, Henry loves this. He has no interest in talking to me, but when I call, he takes the phone from mommy and he’s like, “look, I’m a this.” And “I’m a this.” And on this particular night, he had put up, um, a dinosaur and then he was a shark. He’s like, “I’m a dinosaur.” And he was like, “oh I’m a shark.” And then he hit this button and what popped up, surprised him. It was a monkey and he just yelled….”I’M A MONKEY!!!!”

Joe:
And it was the funniest. It was the funniest thing. I was just like belly laughing at his reaction. But then the second part of the story is even better. My wife came into his room, because he had grabbed the phone and ran into his room, um, and said, all right, I’m going to talk to daddy now. And she takes the phone. And she doesn’t realize at first that the character thing is still enabled until for the first 60 seconds of my conversation with my wife, she was an owl. And I took a screenshot of it on my phone because it was gloriously funny. And then she was finally like, what is… Wait, how do I turn this off? You know? And yeah, just one of those moments when, you know, you’re, you’re, chortling heavily at things like that. So that’s what made me laugh out loud.

Alyssa:
I will not fail to notice that even the emoji was so appropriate. It knew the wisdom of your wife. So therefore, it changed to an owl because it was her.

Joe:
Well. And every time we play with those emojis on the phone, my favorite thing to do is to put the owl head on me and just answer everything with “Who”….”Who”…And I’ve called my mom and I’ve done that. And then my kids even now know that I’m going to do it. And it’s just glorious dad humor. I love it. “Who.”

Alyssa:
It is. It is indeed.

Joe:
And that’s the Camaraderie Question of the Week.

Joe:
Hey BossHeroes, check it out. One of the phone calls I get most often is the “we have one person here who really needs help,” phone call. The leader on the line, tells me about an abrasive executive, a manager not meeting the needs of his or her team, or two physicians who can’t overcome conflict. Their question is always the same. Do you have any training I could provide for this person? I have to tell them the uncomfortable truth. Theirs is a problem that training won’t fix. The problems these leaders describe require a different solution, coaching. A professional coach helps people explore new ways of thinking and operating while examining the root causes of their own behavior. When someone needs to examine their approach, adjust their style, become more adaptable, clarify goals, or navigate conflict, there’s only one coach I recommend… our own, Alyssa Mullet. Alyssa is a professional and executive coach who works one-on-one with clients to tackle the issues that live behind closed doors. Experienced, credentialed, and revered by her clients, Alyssa can help you or any leader struggling on your team, design a path to achievement and professional success. I’ve sent Alyssa to clients all over the country and they rave about her every time, every single time. So, if you have that one leader who is struggling, or that one leader is you, I strongly encourage you to invest in coaching. For more information on working with Alyssa, or to get a quote, visit joemull.com/coaching.

Joe:
All right, folks, as we used to say back in the day, “You’ve got mail.”

Joe:
We should use the old AOL “You’ve Got Mail” sound for that when we do a mail time segment, but that’s probably copywritten. So, we’ll just stick with our little jingle there.

Alyssa:
Yeah. It’s either that or like, what was that movie with Tom Hanks?

Joe:
I believe it was called “You’ve Got Mail.”

Alyssa:
Okay. That’s what I was thinking too. So, either way, it would be an infringement of some kind or something.

Joe:
Well, if the Tom Hanks…Tom Hanks is welcome on the show, anytime… Just as a blanket, putting it out there into the universe, kind of thing.

Alyssa:
Manifest it and make it so. And if he ever comes on the show, I would like to be a part of that, even if I’m just a small little dot on the side of the screen. Okay. That was a really bad tangent….

Joe:
We will absolutely do that.

Joe:
Alright we got some mail. We got a great question this week that I thought we would devote a segment to. This question is from Mary in Montana, and she wrote to us, uh, over email…. And if you want to email the show, you want to ask a question, just shoot an email over to bossbetternow@gmail.com. Here’s Mary’s question: “Hi Joe. I’m hoping you and Alyssa can provide some insight. I oversee an entirely remote working staff. And as of late, I’ve been getting the question: “So what does so-and-so do all day anyway?”, In reference to another employee or staff member. Frankly, this question annoys me. I see how hard they all work, but the…”I work the hardest…” To “no one else works as hard as I do” attitude is rampant. It makes me feel as if I’m possibly not spotlighting their work enough. How can I change this conversation and attitude in our culture?”

Joe:
Oh, I have so much to say… But it’s a short show. We can’t have it be like a two-hour workshop, but… Where do you want to start off?

Alyssa:
Well, the one thing I will say is I feel your pain… Was it, Mary? Uh, that this is so annoying. I mean, for real, did you not… Like the fact that you didn’t like throat punch someone (Joe: That is not an option.) High-five, high-five, to you, high-five to you? Um, The, this question is one that I love to go back with another question because that’s the coach in me, you know? Um, which is, “What’s most important about that to you?” Because that really is what is it that you’re trying to either tell me, covertly… That you are so much more valuable than so-and-so over there? Or why are you so peeved and upset about what it is that they’re doing?… Because you wanted a piece of that action, and you didn’t get it…. You’re trying to fight for more on your plate, what what’s really going on? So that’s my frame of mind. That’s my kind of, go-to on that. What about you, Joe? I know you have a ton to say on this. In fact, you wrote a book on it, which I think everyone should go out and grab No More Team Drama, because it speaks to all of the ways in which you can tackle these types of issues. But give us a little… A little synopsis as what can we impart upon to Mary to say, how can we tackle this?

Joe:
Well, I thank you for the plug, my friend. Yeah. This is something that there’s some psychology here and it’s, it’s, it’s tough to kind of get at all of it in like a five- or seven-minute podcast segment. But, um, a couple of things. First and foremost, Mary, in part, you did sort of answer your own question. You said…maybe… This makes me feel like I’m possibly not spotlighting their work enough. And, and that is certainly the tactical response to wanting to maybe prevent this. If you work in an organization and you want people to have a deeper, more sophisticated understanding of how their teammates spend their time all day, then spotlighting their work more often… asking them to present a little bit more about what, what challenges they face in their role or the kinds of sophisticated problems they solve, or the expertise they are required to bring to their work is a great way to sort of constantly keep people in the loop.

Joe:
It’s also sort of a mini-version of cross-training. That way, if you ever had an interest in moving people around, or people wanted to try their hands at different things, they have a better flavor of what else is going on around them, in their, in their areas. But there’s some underlying psychology here that’s taking place. Let’s, let’s look at the “What does so and so do all day, anyway?” If we look at the underlying assumption, it’s that this person is getting away with something, right? It’s this kind of, well, they might be lazy or, or they’re unskilled. And, um, these are character defects. And one of the things that we know is that there’s a shortcut our brains take and even has a name it’s called the “Fundamental Attribution Error.” And what it is is your brain tells you that when you see someone do something that you don’t understand or agree with, it’s because of their character, not because of their circumstances.

Joe:
And so, in other words, when you see someone do a questionable thing, your brain tells you they’re of questionable character. And when I do workshops on this stuff, I’ll ask a room full of people. What do you assume about somebody who’s late to work? And the first five answers are… “They’re lazy.” “They didn’t plan.” “They don’t care.” “They don’t try.” These are all character defects. Well, what was the reason the last time you were late to work? “Well, my… my kids spilled orange juice on my lap right before I had to leave the house and I needed to change my pants.” So, there’s this shortcut that our brain takes. It fills in the gaps, and it tells us that the people around us have character defects. The other shortcut, our brains take is about ourselves. And that’s related to the other part of what Mary is asking about here.

Joe:
This notion of I work harder than everybody else does, and nobody knows it. There’s another shortcut our brains take, which is called the “Illusory Superiority Bias”, which says that we overestimate our own capacity, our own capabilities, our own knowledge, right? If you ask everybody in a company, um, to rate their contributions on a scale of one to five, nobody picks a two. Almost nobody picks a three, amen. Everybody pick a three-point something or a four, right? We believe that. And this is the other shortcut. Our brains tell us…”I’m a really good person doing the best I can most of the time.” And that Illusory Superiority Bias shows up where we even overestimate our own suffering. When somebody comes to you and tells you how hard they have it, we respond by saying, well, if you think that’s hard, wait until I tell you what I’m going through.

Joe:
Yeah. And… And so, these two biases work hand in hand on teams, right? We more favorably judge ourselves and we more harshly judge others than we should. And so, I’m going to go right back to the coaching question that you threw out. Uh, I like a little bit of a different version of it, which is when somebody says, “why is so-and-so? What does so-and-so do all day anyway?” “Well, what makes you say that? What makes you ask that? And you know, why is that important?” I think as the question that you asked, which is great, it’s another fantastic way to, to get at this, which is like, and here’s another one. “What are you getting at?” Cause if you ask, “Hey, what are you getting at?” With that question that, that kind of will stop people in their tracks and be like, “Well, I was just, you know, curious.” Be like, “if you don’t want people to assume that you’re getting away with murder, then maybe we can all agree not to let everybody not to assume that everybody else is getting away with murder.” Right.

Alyssa:
Right. Wow. I think my brain just had a little mini-explosion there from all of the learning that it just crammed into it…that’s the most I’ve I’ve learned in, in a short amount of time. And I can’t tell you how long, so thank you, Joe. That was….

Joe:
You triggered a mini keynote. Cause I talk about those biases in my No More Team Drama Keynote. So, it just kind of, blah, just, it fell out. And so, you triggered me. I’m sorry.

Alyssa:
Don’t ever be sorry for that kind of trigger. I love it. It’s great. I think our audience benefited greatly.

Joe:
You know, and, and so let’s give Mary these tools then. So, we talked about, yes, Mary spotlight, some of their behaviors more. Um, in one-on-one conversations ask, “Why is that important? What makes you say that? What are you getting at?” Point out the underlying assumptions and say, “Hey, if you’re, you know, if you’re going to assume that people are getting away with something, where does that come from?” Uh, and, and the way we flip that around is instead ask people to assume good intent. “What would make a really good person act this way? What’s more likely that they’re secretly getting away with being lazy or that maybe we just don’t talk a lot about what other people do with their time? What do you think is more likely?” And then yeah. Doing those things that you can to, to shine a light on people’s duties, how they spend their time to do some cross-training, to do some shadowing.

Joe:
Um, I think that’s a great path to this, to, to overcoming this as well. Oh, and one more thing. I have no problem with a boss responding to these kinds of comments and questions with a little, little, tiny bit of an edge. Be like, “Hold on, timeout. That is annoying. That is frustrating. That’s crappy. Like I would never, I would not. Don’t want people to be treated that way here. I don’t wanna want you to ever, uh, have anybody questioning you in that way and I’m not gonna let you do it to others. You know, if you, if you feel like that, they’re getting away with something, go ask them.” (Alyssa: Yep.) You know, we’re about the no drama here.

Alyssa:
I like it sassy. I like Sassy Joe!

Joe:
I’m bringing the sauce.

Joe:
That’s Mail Time. So, we’d love to hear from you again, send us your questions, your topics to bossbetternow@gmail.com.

Joe:
Well, that’s our show this week, BossHeroes. We are so grateful that you were with us. Please take a moment to share these episodes and clips on your social media with those around you. It makes a huge difference for us as we try to grow this show, grow this audience, and serve your boss’ soul. Until next time, thanks for all that you do to take care of so many.

Alyssa:
This show is sponsored by Joe Mull and Associates. Remember commitment comes from better bosses, visit joemull.com today.

 

 

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